Graham the Scarecrow

Graham was a scarecrow
In the field day and night
His job was very simple
To give the crows a fright

He stood out there in rain and sun
And in wind and snow
Scaring all the naughty birds
So that the crops could grow

But in time his power waned
And the birds took little note
Of his outstretched arms
And his flapping coat

Then a cheeky starling
Without asking leave
Started plucking threads out
Of Graham’s tattered sleeve

The crows pecked gaping holes
In poor Graham’s vest
And a jackdaw filched his buttons
To decorate it’s nest

With all his stuffing gone
Graham hung there quite forlorn
While all the laughing birds
Shouted out their scorn

The crows brought all their friends
To come and peck and rob
And laugh at the old scarecrow
Who couldn’t do his job

But Graham had the last laugh
On these avians so ignoble
For his previous home was on a farm
Just outside Chernobyl

The sparrows glowed in the dark
The jackdaw’s beak fell off
And all the laughing crows
Developed hacking coughs

Graham may not look so tough
But his power is inherent
And the birds all keep away now
‘Cause he’s a nuclear deterrent